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changes come. and sometimes they're better than you ever expected. it finally happened for mike and i. and i'm exceptionally happy.
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"the heart has its reasons; that reason knows not of." -blaise pascal
i've
lost my passion. i've found myself trying to navigate through this fog
of melancholy, feeling as if all the life is being sucked out of me.
and i'm done.
enough is enough.
the Lord has been doing such a precious work in me over this last year, and i refuse to give in to this attack.
i was reading my utmost for his highest
several days ago, and something hit me hard. in matthew 11:28, Jesus
says, "come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens,
and i will give you rest."
oswald chambers discusses this
verse, saying, "'and i will give you rest,' i.e., i will stay you.
not—i will put you to bed and hold your hand and sing you to sleep;
but—i will get you out of bed, out of the languor and exhaustion, out
of the state of being half dead while you are alive; i will imbue you
with the spirit of life, and you will be stayed by the perfection of
vital activity." this speaks to where i've been exactly. and to what i
need.
isaiah 40:31 says, "but those who trust in the Lord will
find new strength. they will soar high on wings like eagles. they will
run and not grow weary. they will walk and not faint." this is what
living in the Spirit is supposed to be!
and so i will. not
because i'm going to try even harder, but because i'm going to stop
trying at all. and i'm going to let the Lord take over.
it always come back to this.
and so i'm going for it. i'm all in.
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someone from belgium looks at my site almost every day. this makes me curious.
life is good. the Lord is faithful. i'm striving to take every day as it comes. matthew 6:25-34 has been my anthem [yet again]. here's a taste:
"give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes." matthew 6:34
i feel a change coming on. a change in the air, in my surroundings, in myself.
my word for 2008: transformation
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i've been reading a lot lately, especially from the message. i'm reading a lot about what's really important in life.
also, i've been listening. and i've been hearing some really good things.
one thing in particular is this:
it's not really so important
that you are where you want to be,
or even that you're happy.
the most important thing is
to be content
with where God has you,
right now.
it's really all about
discovering
the character
of God.
i've been looking for peace.
not only am i finding it,
i'm finding joy as well.
the Lord is faithful.
and sometimes the hardest thing
is the best thing.
the healthiest thing.
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this has been the week from hell. my stomach has been tied up in knots as i have been trying to deal with some very overwhelming things. but God is faithful. and heather's coming today! i really couldn't ask for a more amazing friend. really.
i'm praying that this weekend brings peace and some much needed joy.
[psalm 13 is my heart right now]
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